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which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners: 1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time. 2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole. 3 Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. 4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly. 5. Bozone (n.): The substance stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. 6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid. 7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high 8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it. 9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. 10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness. 11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.) 12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer. 13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you 14. Glibido: All talk and no action. 15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. 16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web. 17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at in the morning and cannot be cast out. 18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

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Do Not Go Into That Good Night Do not go into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Though men at their end know dark is right, Because their words had forked no lightning they Do not go into that good night. Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Wild men who caught and the sun in flight, And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way, Do not go into that good night. Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight Blind eyes could like meteors and be gay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. And you, my father, there on that height, Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.